Gottman’s Four Horsemen in a Polyamorous Context
The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse is a metaphor originally put forth by Dr. John Gottman, a prevalent relationship researcher. Dr. Gottman used this description for four forms of negative communication patterns (criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling) because they will often, and very effectively, end a relationship (Gottman & Silver, 2015). While this research was [...]
Bisexual Polyamorous Clients in Therapy
Before getting into this article, I would like to locate myself. I am a white, bisexual, able-bodied, ambiamorous, cisgender woman with anxiety and a chronic illness who has been in both monogamous and polyamorous relationships. As someone who identifies as bisexual, has navigated both polyamorous and monogamous relationships, and specializes in working with these [...]
Mono-Poly Relationships in Therapy
Ask Us Anything: How does a therapist deal with a couple where one partner prefers monogamy and the other wants to be polyamorous?
First, we can consider the many ways in which one might ask this question, which can change its meaning. There are several situations when this will come up in the therapy room, and [...]
A COVID-Era Review of Five Fabulous LGBTQIA+ Adult Coloring Books
Coloring Books in Therapy
Coloring books aren’t just for children anymore: adult coloring books have gained great popularity in the last few years. They have been found to reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression; increase perseverance; and provide short-term stress relief (Eaton & Tieber, 2017; Flett et al., 2017; Rajendran et al., 2020; Simmons, 2016). [...]
Managing Jealousy in a Polyamorous Relationship
Stephanie M. Sullivan, MS, LLMFT
Keywords: Polyamory
When people are first introduced to the idea of polyamory, one of the first questions they ask is often about jealousy. How do people in polyamorous relationships manage jealousy? Are they ever jealous? In the vast majority of polyamorous relationships, jealousy does come up at some point. However, [...]
Finding a Polyamory-Affirmative Therapist
By Stephanie M. Sullivan, MS, LLMFT
Many people, across all walks of life, occasionally need therapeutic services. Due to the stigma surrounding mental health, it can be difficult for anyone to contact a mental health therapist. However, if you are polyamorous or curious about exploring polyamory, you may struggle even more with reaching out to [...]
Types of Consensual Non-Monogamy
By Stephanie M. Sullivan, MS, LLMFT
Consensual non-monogamy is a relationship style in which all individuals within the relationship agree to not being monogamous, and all individuals involved in the relationship are aware that it is not a monogamous relationship. Consensual non-monogamy makes up about 4-5% of the population in the United States (Moors, Conley, [...]
Polyamorous Relationship Structures
By Stephanie M. Sullivan, MS, LLMFT
Polyamory is the combination of the Greek word for “many” and the Latin word for “love.” Combined, polyamory means “many loves” or “more than one love” (Anapol, 2010; Klesse 2006). To be more specific, polyamory is a relationship style centered on the belief that it is possible to love [...]